Dear Pequenas Flores,

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What Are Your Birthmarks?

Women! What are your birthmarks? What are you trying to hide from the world that God made perfect and beautiful? Where do all of these emotions go when you don’t have the language to talk to your birthmarks? Emotions like confusion or sadness or anger or hate?

They get buried in our bodies and they harm our immune systems and we live in states of freeze or depression, as was the case for most of my teenage and 20 something years. Gabor Mate in The Myth of Normal gives study upon study that shows the relationship between stuffing emotions (especially in women who aren’t supposed to express “bad” or interrupting emotions) and cancer or auto-immune diseases.

When I began using my journal as a sounding board and as a really cheap therapist, I realized I could say on the page what I couldn’t say out loud in the home. Poetry was my human voice and I became of interest to myself (idea adapted from Elizabeth Alexander’s poetry). I could take a compassionate gaze at a girl becoming woman who hated herself 💕

I pulled out old school photos and wrote self-portrait poems. I looked closely at my face in the photos, at my posture, where my hands were resting. I imagined what she must have been feeling, what she was holding back, what she was too choked up to speak about. 

This helped me love her, even when she couldn’t love herself in those moments of fear and self-loathing. 

This helped me see her, even when she hadn’t been seen or validated before.

These poems began my journey of learning how to mother myself as an adult. 

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The Flow of Writing

In Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, he writes: “The important thing is to enjoy the activity for its own sake, and to know that what matters is not the result, but the control one is acquiring over one’s attention.”

Join me on Wednesday November 2nd at 6:15 p.m. Mountain Time to learn the stream of consciousness technique, where you will learn how to take great joy in focusing attention on your intuitive flow.

Please register for the session here. Your first session in The Writing Shed is always free!

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Writing to Get Unstuck

Dr Maggie is so happy to be back in The Writing Shed! A type of expressive writing called the exposure method can help you adjust to a difficult life or transition. With the simple act of returning to the same life situation across three different writing sessions, you will experience greater habituation or adjustment. Researchers have also found that there can be some cognitive understanding gained with this method. The idea isn’t to “beat the issue to death”; it is to continue to look at the life situation from a slightly different angle so that it begins to feel more normal and less shocking. How do you adjust to new realities? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments.
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Teacher Loneliness

Lonely as a teacher? Do you ask yourself where your people are? Does your school discourage you from talking about your personal life or advocating for your mental well-being? Do you wonder why the professional development you are offered never seems to energize you? Do you laugh and secretly cry every time you hear about how well Finnish teachers are doing? In a research article in the International Journal for the Practice and Theory of Creative Writing, the authors note: “Both the academic literature and educational policy documents have emphasized that in order to support teachers’ professional development, teachers should be offered both individual and personally inspiring education that facilitates the development of both teachers and school communities.” What’s your story? How could you be supported more at your school?

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Seeking Feedback

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Hello. I am . . .

. . . an HSP artist and Expressive Writing Teacher. I’d like to re-introduce myself. Alongside blog posts, bios, and portfolio items, we have stories that shape us and motivate us to do our thang. 

By way of Ms. Baz, my third grade teacher, I share a piece of the real me in this video. The real me is the child who feels safe in the classroom, my place of liberation and expression. 

Starting The Writing Shed comes from this place of joy and warmth that Ms. Baz embodied. 

Thank you for listening and engaging. Thank you for using your precious time so that we can connect anew. 

I’d love to hear your ideas and impressions in the Comments feature below. 

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Creative Expression is Worth the Risk

Why are we so afraid to be creative?

Because creative expression is hard work. Because the imagination works slowly. Because who has time to be still and listen to what resonates? Because it makes you vulnerable. Because you have to forget about yourself. Because there are no guarantees. Because failing is the point. Because it is risky. We might look stupid. People might connect our ideas with our self-worth. Because you might be wrong. You might be laughed at or shamed. You might look stupid in front of peers. You will have to admit you don’t know. Because you will have to practice new skills. Because it’s hard work. Because, as John Daido Loori tells us in The Zen of Creativity, you won’t be an original for a very long time.

Why should we practice our creativity anyway?

Because it’s hard work. Because slowing down lets us observe our lives. Because, listening, we can invite inspiration, which makes life bright. Because vulnerability builds intimacy. What a joyful cry! Because you have to forget about yourself. Just see what is in front of you. Because impermanence is the way of life. Because failing just means you showed up. Because being wrong is humbling. Because discussing shame interrupts patterns that dehumanize you. 

Admitting you don’t know will feel like you have been reunited with friend from elementary school. She doesn’t judge you or belittle you. She too has marched in a band uniform down Main Street playing a half-learned tune. 

Practicing new skills will make you an expert. 

Because hard work is the way of life. Because creating something original isn’t the point. Creativity that embodies your own unique reality is the point.

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Why I Started The Writing Shed

I’ve started The Writing Shed because I want to help you express what is on your heart. Ever since I can remember, I’ve always wanted to express myself, but didn’t know how or didn’t have the space to experiment. I felt awkward sharing my heart. I felt uncomfortable crying. I could feel the blue balloon in my throat and had to remind myself to breathe. I wanted to tell my grade school teachers I was lonely, but the word lonely was not spoken at home. Speaking from this experienced pain, I can now say that expressive writing about my life has helped me find liberation from this sore throat. 

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I have come to understand that expression, for me, is everything it means to be whole and healed. It means I have come home to myself, and I can talk to her. I can form a wave with my body, from one end of my fingertips to the other end; I can say a prayer for myself; I can ask a stranger if she’ll let me cut the rose blooms off her bushes; it means I can say “no” when I know it’s not part of my future self; it means I can be in the habit of writing a journal; it means I can draw squiggles with watercolor.

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I can utter, move, forgive, speak, and share with authenticity. That’s what expression means to me. And yet, it’s not always easy.
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